9:15am

sometimes a person will squeeze my arm&say something like "you've got no meat on you. go eat something." so i laugh&mention some nasty food, like "i'm getting wendy's after this." i would never. fast food isn't allowed. but it gives people back their carefree american attitude after my...whatever it is...makes them worry. i hate when people look me up&down&then give me a look i'm supposed to understand. either a sad, quizzical, annoyed, or, worst of all, a knowing look. you know, they purse their lips into a thin smile, make their eyes a tiny bit sad, &give the slightest nod. it's a knowing look. but what do they know?
something else i hate is when something bad happens to someone else&you can't do a motherfucking thing about it so you just have to hold on to what you have. i'm always at the dog park. since i have an italian greyhound, people are curious. they're not terribly common. people ask about her 'fragile legs' but i always tell them they're more sturdy than they look. last night i met my brother, his wife, &her father at the dog park. surprise was having fun. perseus (pur-say-us), spartacus, &little girl were having fun, too. then perseus jumped all the way up into my brother's arms. my brother is a big guy. then she jumped back down, onto the concrete. as soon as she landed my sister-in-law said "oh gosh, it's broken." fuck. yes, i watched a dog break her leg. after telling people that my dog's legs are so sturdy. since it was late they had it splinted at the emergency vet clinic&got pain meds. they'll take her to a vet they trust to set&cast it. so i'm paranoid about surprise's legs today. but we'll go running.

or:

i know some people have medical reasons that they're overweight, but most don't. i wish people would stop acting like it's some disability we've got to make room for. stay strong today, lovelies.

xoxo

zette

p.s. falling in love with hunger pains.