12:16pm

important stuff: i binged last night. on pizza. my intake for the day was about (890) so yes, i'm feeling quite disgusting. i haven't been able to weigh myself but it's not a weigh day anyway. i've decided they're sunday, tuesday, thursday. friday&saturday suck calorie-wise usually but as long as i work it off saturday night, sunday's weigh-in is alright. so that's how it'll be. mm, coffee for breakfast.
unimportant stuff: i hung out at starbucks for a bit yesterday. boy&his friends came by&invited me to join them at chili's. so i did. (i brought my starbucks tea with me&i didn't order any food.) i was quiet for the first 10 minutes. it didn't help that my curls were a mess&i swear the white t-shirt i wore made me look like a beluga whale. then i made a joke&everyone laughed&i felt tons better.
but then, when it was time to go, the girl who was giving rides was figuring out who was going with her. "i can take J, B, M, M's girlfriend..." that really bothered me for some reason. i wanted to get pissed off&tell her i still have a name. but i didn't. i told him politely that i couldn't go with them, that i should stay in town so my mother&i could run errands later. so he gave me a hug&left. i turned up my ipod&walked away feeling as grumpy&independent as ever. i get a gold star for not needing people.
however, M does make me smile. he texted me a while after that to tell me i looked super cute. we both know i looked like shit. but still, he's a sweet boy. so for now, i'm fine with having a sweet boy be proud to claim me, 15lbs too fat, in front of his buddies. he'll like me even better when i'm skinny.

or:

i don't like cowboy boots. (which is against the rules in the state i live in, i think) but that girl's legs are darling. it looks like she's naturally that size. some of us aren't. we have to work for it. stay strong today, lovelies.

xoxo

zette

p.s. i bought a water bottle&carry it with me always. makingmyselfdrinkwater.