getting sick when you're juuuust slightly underweight is a total bitch. i feel like i've had endless calories in homemade soup. threw up this morning before i ate anything. my mother came in the bathroom, turned the light on, yelled at me to stop&get up. she doesn't know i purge. so that was her just being a total asshole. took a 3hour nap. woke up feeling like i went through a tornado (sorry, been watching storm chasers on netflix.) all my muscles hurt. sitting at the computer with a blanket. i hate those awkward seconds when you stand up&it's lights out. you just have to stand there&keep your eyes open until your vision kicks in&you can continue. so basically, i feel awful. been replying to emails though. hoping it's a 24-hour thing so i can work out tomorrow. also first counseling appointment on monday. partly hoping i have some contagious raging virus still in my system so i can skip it. i don't feel like letting someone new into my life right now. so whatever. sorry i've been awol. thanks for all the emails, especially mallory&tess. i looked back at that anonymous comment just now&i want to cry.
these chicks are my age. they look super young though. anyway, stay strong today, lovelies.
xoxo
zette
p.s. thank motherfucking god on high i have nyquil. i feel so helpless.
p.p.s. little lady olivia lee your comment made a bad day so much better. kudos for finding that bad video. mwah<3
I feel like you are spiralling down, please don't be offended by that. I just don't want it to happen to you, so please take good care of yourself. You are to important to let yourself be sick.
ReplyDeleteLoads of love to you,
Merely
I'm sorry to hear you're sick. It really does suck :(
ReplyDeleteJust remember to give your body what it needs to recover, or it can take ages! I'm not saying you should binge on everything in the house. But if you can, sneak some fruit and some protein down there, your body will be happy for it.
Stay strong! <3
Look after yourself darling, please and get well soon xx
ReplyDeleteI hope you feel better Zette - I was a little behind on your posts... I just saw your last one regarding your dad. I can't even imagine what that must feel like. You seem to handle it in a really mature way, which is amazing.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry your mom is also being so difficult. It can be truly terrible the way that parents treat their children sometimes - it's like they think that because they birthed us and raised us that they can say/do whatever they please. Granted, my parents are pretty wonderful most of the time, but sometimes my mom can be horrific and just trample all over my feelings and think it's her duty/right. Ugh. Families can be so troublesome.
Chin up Zette.
Any time doll, I'm glad it cheered you up. I hope the bug goes away and the appt goes well! love love
ReplyDeleteomg i hate being sick when you rly havent been eating much. theres times where i was so sick i actually thought i was dying.
ReplyDeleteI hope your feeling better Zette! I bet you look fabulous! :)
ReplyDelete